Yesterday I opened my first electricity bill. (Not that I haven’t opened electricity bills before. But this one wasn’t Mum’s. This one was mine. This one had my husband’s name on it. Which means we have to pay it.) And after opening it, I wished I hadn’t. It was terrifying. While the calculations assure me that we are well below the average two-person household’s daily usage, there are a number of strange charges that make it add up to quite a large sum! Someone shoot me now!
Anyway, opening said bill killed my happy mood for the day. So in an effort to cheer myself up, I read a few blogs. One lady mentioned melting a potholder on a stove. Which reminded me of some of my kitchen disasters. (Apart from the casserole disaster, all of these occurred before I was married. Which means that if my husband doesn’t like my cooking style, he should have thought of that before he married me!)
My first ever kitchen disaster wasn’t so bad. I had been boiling an egg, and when I went to remove the shell it wasn’t quite done. No problem, I thought. Microwaves were invented for a reason. Ha! Don’t ever put a half-boiled egg in the microwave – it explodes! I ended up with egg all over the inside of the microwave. Fun. But I learnt my lesson, and I’ve never tried that again.
The next time I went near a microwave I was attempting to dry herbs. I had a herb garden and a few things like parsley and basil were growing out of control. So I figured that drying the excess would be a wonderful idea. I wasn’t sure on how to do it so I googled it. (Don’t ever listen to Google!) I found a whole ‘how to’ microwave method – quick and easy! Herbs on a sheet of paper towel for 1 minute. Anyone could do that! So I tried it. The first time it worked brilliantly – nicely dried herbies with no effort whatsoever! The second attempt was more disastrous. The paper towel went up in flames, and brilliant me grabbed it out of the microwave and tossed it on the kitchen floor. This burnt a hole into the lino. The herbs were dried alright – dried and burnt to a crisp! After that, I went and bought a food dehydrator.
I have a funny feeling I shouldn’t go anywhere near microwaves. Or fire. Or perhaps eggs, herbs, and casserole.