Yesterday morning my husband left to work a few hours away for the rest of the week. Which means I’m on my own. And lonely.
I suppose for most people this wouldn’t be so bad. But I don’t like it. At all. For quite a few reasons. First of all I have a fear of the dark. Well, not the actual dark, just the things that may be in it! So while being home alone is quite fine normally, once it gets dark it starts to make me nervous.
Which brings me to my next problem. I had never slept in a house alone at night. Ever. (Yes, I realise that at my age this is abnormal, but it’s just one of those things that hasn’t happened.) So that makes me slightly nervous too.
My other problem is that I miss my husband terribly. We haven’t been apart overnight since we got married. It’s bad enough when he gets home late from work – it’s lonely and boring! But at least usually I can enjoy getting dinner and cleaning up everything ready for when he gets home. This time he won’t be home til Friday night. And that makes me lonely. What makes it worse is that he doesn’t even have reception so he can’t call or even text me.
Last night didn’t turn out so bad. I went over to a friend’s house and watched a movie and ate icecream and laughed til we couldn’t laugh any more. And then I came home to my lonely house and went to bed. I had thought that I wouldn’t be able to sleep at all because I was nervous and worried about my husband. But his workmate had a bit of reception so he was able to text and let me know they were safe. Coupled with a bit of prayer and being really tired, I slept like a log and didn’t feel nervous at all.
Tonight was worse. Being at home by myself is very boring. There is so much to do but absolutely no motivation to do it on my own. (I managed to feed the birds and water the plants at least – so everything will still be alive when the man of the house gets home!) It’s hard to gather any excitement for cooking dinner when you know you will have to eat it by yourself. It’s also hard to concentrate – I burnt all of my patties and dropped a whole scoop of icecream on the floor!
Everything just seems wrong! I miss having someone to talk to, I miss his help with getting everything done. I miss getting a hug at the end of a long day. I even miss having an elbow collide with my nose in the middle of the night!
He’s not perfect by any means. There are lots of things he does that annoy me, sometimes even things that make me mad. But somehow love fixes all that and makes the annoying things bearable. It makes me think of a verse in the Bible.
‘Love covers all wrongs.’ Proverbs 10:12 NIV
It really does. I am so blessed. And I can’t wait til he gets home!